The Roads in Life

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For several years, I kept a hand-out my secondary two teacher gave out. It was Robert Frost's poem "The Road Not Taken". We had analyzed it in class and I decided to keep it, without knowing why:

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Growing up, I frequented two places daily: home and school. People's reactions to my behaviour and my interests always made me feel like I was not normal. I preferred being alone to being with people I didn't like and that made me weird. The stories I wrote which were full of emotions were also considered weird. People spoke over me and tried to force their opinions onto me. I didn't have any support; I was alone.

Five years later, I was in cegep and started my first job in a boutique. As I became acquainted with the staff, I found that my manager, although he was a photographer as opposed to a writer, shared my interests and I, at last, had found one solid connection in life. After reading two of my poems, he said, "It is a harduous path [following your heart] because only the bravest choose these paths. But it is yours..."

Two years later, I was listening to the soundtrack from one of my favourite television shows, Quantum Leap. The show features a man who is able to leap into other people's bodies throughout time and, in order to leap out again, has to fix things in the people's lives to change history for the better. The show demonstrates that leaping can be lonely and one of the songs on the soundtrack, "Fate's Wide Wheel", features loneliness as its main theme:

Fate's Wide Wheel

As I travel in space and time, I want to stay, I want to go.
You see my face but it's not mine, what you can't see, you'll never know.
How can we meet if I'm not there? Our hearts may touch. Our bodies close.
But time divides what we might share and sends a soul where no one goes.
I'm just a traveler upon the sea, of time, of life, of Fate's Wide Wheel.
Just a traveler in this mystery. The me I am is all that's real to me.

We all begin this life alone. We live, we love all through the years.
Yet deep inside we long for home. But it receeds, obscured by tears.
I cry to Time; it falls past me. The door of Fate remains asleep.
But in my soul, this hope burns free... Oh please let there be one final leap.
I'm just a traveler upon the sea of time, of life, of Fate's Wide Wheel.
Just a traveler in this mystery. The me I am is all that's real to me.

Finally, everything connected in my mind when I heard "But time divides what we might share and sends a soul where no one goes". I understood why I had kept Frost's poem and that it wasn't bad that people thought I was weird. It is my identity. I am a writer: a traveller through time via words and stories. And so, I consciously and willingly follow this road and it "has made all the difference".

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